Be Overwhelmed
Often a sense of my heart and my innermost engulf the whole . He is in deep love and fear , anguish , grief , helplessness and depression is also .
The course itself is very similar in the different impulses : he Bawaveshit grow . Whether you love it , hate it , whether it be anger ; it could be anything . If it gets too high, so it gives the sensation of being Bawaveshit him . Even the pain and discomfort create the same experience .This is particularly indicative of a Bawaveshit personality . When it is anger , then it is perfectly anger . And when it 's love , it 's love totally . It fully, like a blind man drowns in that sense . And consequently the act , he is wrong . Even if it turns out he Bawaveshit love, even if the act is not right .Walk
towards the core , even when you 're charged a sense , you lose the
argument , you all subscriptions , will lose their heart .It is almost like a black cloud which you have lost . Then whatever you do is going to be incorrect .Love should not be part of your passion . Usually people think and feel the same , but whatever it is Bawaveshit , is very unstable . It comes like a breeze and goes through , and behind you, blank , diffuse , leaving misery and suffering .The
existence of the man who , to his mind , his heart , then go to your
being , according to him , should not an expression of love your
innermost passion .Price is very delicate , is very variable . One moment everything is the same , the next moment you 're all clear .That 's why the first thing is to love the rush of emotion out of the process has to be charged . Love is not emotion .On the contrary , love is a deep insight , clarity , sensitivity and awareness .But this kind of love is rarely available , because sometimes only reaches one's privacy .Some people who love their cars ... That love is the love of the mind . And then your wife , your husband , your child will love ... love is love of the heart . But it requires a change to stay alive , and since you do not allow her versatility , she is idiotically . The same day husband ... It is very boring experience . It is blunt your sensitivity , it is likely to impair allows everyone to enjoy . You slowly start to forget the language of laughter . Life without happiness is nothing more than a job . And you have to work because your wife and your kids .You must be out of his love for emotional tightness met you you were born , and you must find a way to access your Being . Until that becomes a part of you, your love , grief , depression and pain is no different
by
k.jagadeesh
+91-9841121780, 9543187772
Email:jagadeeshkri@gmail.com.
Why Meditate? - Osho :
Meditation is a way of settling in oneself, at the innermost core of
your being. Once you have found the center of your existence, you will
have found both your roots and your wings.
The roots are in
existence, making you a more integrated human being, an individual. And
the wings are in the fragrance that is released by being in contact with
existence. The fragrance consists of freedom, love, compassion, authenticity, sincerity, a sense of humor, and a tremendous feeling of blissfulness.
The roots make you an individual, and the wings give you the freedom to
love, to be creative, to share unconditionally the joy that you have
found. The roots and wings come together. They are two sides of one
experience, and that experience is finding the center of your being.
We are continuously moving on the circumference, always somewhere else
far away from our own being, always directed towards others. When all
this is dropped, when all objects are dropped, when you close your eyes
to all that is not you –even your mind, your heartbeats are left far
behind – only a silence remains.
In this silence you will
settle slowly into the center of your being, and then the roots will
grow on their own accord, and the wings too. You need not worry about
them. You cannot do anything about them. They come on their own.
You simply fulfill one condition: that is, to be at home – and the whole existence becomes a bliss to you, a benediction.
The Upanishad,
The inner revolution brings freedom and the only way to make oneself go
through the inner revolution is meditation. Meditation simply means
learning to forget all that you have learned. It is a process of
deconditioning, a process of dehypnosis.
The society has
burdened everybody with thousands of thoughts. Meditation simply helps
you to come out of that world of thoughts, into a state of silence. It
is a process of cleaning your slate completely, it is emptying all that
has been forced and stuffed inside you.
Once you are empty,
spacious, silent, clean, the revolution has happened, the sun has risen;
then you live in its light! And to live in the light of your inner sun
is to live rightly. In fact that is the only way to live. Others are
only dying, just dying slowly, moving in a queue that goes on becoming
shorter and shorter every moment, and any moment you may be the first in
the queue. In fact everybody is trying to be first in the queue; a
great desire to be the first everywhere.
The ordinary life is
only called life – it is not. It is only so-called life. It is a process
of gradual death or to be more accurate, a process of gradual suicide.
The moment you become silent and aware and clear and your inner sky is
full of delight, you know the first taste of true life. One can call it
god, one can call it enlightenment, one can call it liberation; the
experience of truth, love, freedom, bliss – different names but the
phenomenon is the same.
by
k.jagadeesh
+919841121780, 9543187772
Email:jagadeeshkri@gmail.com
BECOME A CHILD AGAIN
In my college days I used to go for a morning walk very early, three
o'clock, four o'clock in the morning. Just beside my house was a small
street with bamboo groves, very dark.... And that was the best place,
because it was very rare to meet anybody there... just one watchman from
a rich man's house used to see me.
But one day-this is what perhaps you would call going out of control:
I was jogging along the street and the idea came to me that it would be
good if I jogged backwards. In India there is a superstition that
ghosts walk backwards, but I had completely forgotten that, and anyway
there was nobody on the street... so I started jogging backwards. I was
enjoying it so much, and it was such a cool morning.
Then the
milkman happened to see me.... People used to bring milk from small
villages, and he had come a little earlier than usual, so he had never
met me before. Carrying his buckets of milk, he suddenly saw me. I must
have been under the shadow of the bamboos, and when he came close to the
shadow where there was a small patch of moonlight, I suddenly came out,
jogging backwards. He shouted, "My God!" dropped both his buckets, and
ran away.
Still, I did not realize that he was afraid of me, I
thought he was afraid of something else. So I took both his buckets,
although the milk was gone.... I thought I should at least give him his
buckets, so I ran after him. Seeing me coming... I have never seen
anybody run so fast! He could have been a world champion in any race. I
was very surprised. I was shouting, "Wait!" and he looked back, and
without saying anything....
The whole scene was being watched by the gatekeeper of the rich man. He told me, "You will kill him."
I said, "I am simply going to return his buckets."
He said, "You leave the buckets with me; when the sun rises he will
come. But don't do such things-sometimes you make me afraid too, but
because I know.... For years I have been seeing you doing all kinds of
strange things on this street, but sometimes I become afraid; I think:
who knows whether it is really you or a ghost coming backwards towards
me? Sometimes I close the gate and go inside; I keep my gun always
loaded because of you!"
I said, "You should understand one thing,
that if I am a ghost, your gun will be useless-you cannot kill a ghost
with a bullet. So don't ever use it, because a ghost will not be
affected by it; but if a real man is there, you may be arrested as a
murderer."
He said, "That's true. That I never thought about it,
that ghosts...." And right in front of me, he took out all the bullets.
He said, "Sometimes the fear is so great... I may shoot some man and
kill him."
I said, "Just look at me: first be certain whether I am a
real man or a ghost. You are taking your bullets out, and it may be
just a ghost who is persuading you!"
He said, "What...?" And he started putting the bullets back in his gun.
I said, "You keep these two buckets." I remained for almost six months
in that part of the city, and every day I asked the watchman, "Has that
man come yet?"
He said, "He has not come. These two buckets are
still waiting for him, and I think that now he will never come. Either
he has gone forever, or he has become so afraid of this place that he
never comes on this street. I have been watching and when my shift
changes and the other watchman comes, I tell him that if somebody
comes... and we keep these buckets in front of the gate, so he will
recognize that his buckets are here. But six months have passed, and
there is no sign of him."
I said, "This is a very strange thing."
He said, "There is nothing strange about it. You would have killed
anybody, coming suddenly out of the darkness. Why were you going
backwards? Jogging I know many people do, but doing it backwards...."
I said, "I have been jogging, and I became bored always going forwards;
just for a change I was trying it backwards. I never realized that just
on that day that idiot was going to come-nobody ever comes on this
street. That man must have spread a rumor-and rumors spread like
wildfire. Even the landlord in whose house I was living heard that on
this street....
He told me, "Stop going so early for your morning walk; go only when the sun has risen, because one man has seen a ghost."
I said, "Who told you?"
He said, "My wife told me, and the whole neighborhood knows; after eight o'clock in the evening the street becomes empty."
I told him, "You may not believe it, but there was no ghost. In fact, it was I who was jogging backwards...."
He said, "Don't try to fool me."
I said, "You can come with me. At three o'clock in the morning there is nobody."
He said, "Why should I take the risk? But one thing is certain: if you
don't stop going, then you will have to leave my house. You cannot live
here."
I said, "This is very strange. Even if the street is full of
ghosts, why should you insist that I leave your house? You cannot force
me. I pay the rent... you have given me a receipt. And in the court you
cannot say that it is because this man goes on a street where ghosts
jog-I don't think any court is going to accept this reason."
He
said, "Do you mean you will drive me to the courts? If you are so
insistent, you can live in this house. I will sell it. I will leave this
house."
"But," I said, "I am not a ghost."
He said, "That I
know-but mixing with ghosts? Some day some ghost may follow you into the
house-and I am a man with a wife and children. I don't want to take any
risks."
Here in my commune, you don't need to be afraid: you
can jog backwards, and even if you are a real ghost, nobody is going to
take any notice of you!
What is the relationship between sex and death?
I have said that man is afraid of both. That's why they are taboos. No one talks about sex and no one talks about death.
We remain silent about these two things. We have remained silent for
centuries and centuries. They are taboo subjects, they should not even
be mentioned. The moment they are mentioned, something starts trembling
within us.
It seems that a deep
repression is there. That's why we have created substitute words. In
the western world they do not say, "We are having sex." They say, "We
are making love." It's a substitute word. And false, because love is a
totally different dimension. Having sex is having sex; it is not making
love. Love may include sex, but it has a different quality altogether.
We never talk about death directly. If someone dies, we use substitute
words. We say he has gone to meet his Father, or he has gone to heaven.
Death is never faced directly.
We have created many false
phenomena around death and sex. If two persons are going to be married,
sex is not even mentioned. And they are going to be married for sex! We
have created a great illusion around marriage, but the bare, naked fact
is sex. We have created a ritual, a great ritual of marriage, just to
hide the fact. Why?
Why is there a taboo about these two things only? The two are deeply related. The reason for their relationship is this:
First, you are born out of sex; birth is sex. And birth and death are
two poles of one thing. In your very birth, death is hidden. That's why
man became aware of the deep relationship between sex and death. Death
cannot happen without sex just like birth cannot happen without sex.
You may wonder.... There are organisms - amoeba and other bacteria -
that are not born out of sex but out of simple division. Amoeba go on
growing, feeding. A certain limit is reached where the body divides into
two, because it becomes so big that now the amoeba cannot move. Up to a
certain limit the body goes on growing and then it divides in two. Then
the two bodies go on growing and divide into four. There is no sex,
just simple division. That's why the amoeba is known as deathless.
Amoeba never die. If food is supplied continuously, amoeba never die.
There is no need to die, because there is no sex.
Man cannot
become immortal unless we find something that changes the whole process
of reproduction. If a man can be born without sex, he will never die.
Death is part of sex just like birth is part of sex.
This can be
understood in another way also. Those who have been most fascinated and
obsessed with the concept of immortality, all those traditions that have
tried somehow to make man immortal, have always been against sex. Yoga,
particularly hatha yoga, has tried deeply to find methods to prolong
life. That is why hatha yoga is against sex. Hatha yoga says that if you
want to prolong life, don't move into sex, because sex brings death
nearer.
But you are already born, so you are already involved
in sex. Whether you repress your sex, or you express it, will not make
much difference. You have already moved into one side. The other will
follow.
Sex and death are deeply related in another sense also. In a
deep sex act, you feel a certain death, as if you are no more. If you
have really gone into the act totally, you are merged. Your individual
entity disappears and a greater force than you takes over. The sex act
starts as a voluntary act, but it never ends as a voluntary act. A point
comes where your voluntary mechanism is taken over by the nonvoluntary.
A point comes where your conscious mind is thrown off and the
unconscious takes over. A point comes when your ego cannot exist and the
non-ego is in power, in control. You feel a sudden death of the ego;
you feel you are dying.
That's why people who are very egoistic
cannot achieve sexual orgasm. They cannot be in a let-go; they cannot
allow their unconscious to take over. They remain mentally conscious and
they try to control the whole process. Then, they cannot achieve a deep
sexual orgasm. The more civilized man becomes, the less possibility
there is of orgasm. That blissful moment when your ego is lost and you
are merged into existence is a certain death: death of the ego, death of
the conscious, death of your individuality.
That's why those who
are afraid of sex will be afraid of death and those who are afraid of
death will be afraid of sex. The fear is there that "I may be lost. How
am I to be certain that I will be capable of coming back?" It is
uncertain. Who knows whether you will come back or whether you will go
on and on, and disappear completely?
The same fear comes in
meditation also. It is again going to be a deep orgasm, similar in many
ways to a sexual orgasm. In a sense, exactly the same.
Now,
modern psychology, particularly Jung's psychology, has come to discover a
concept, a very old tantric concept. Tantra says that every man and
woman is bisexual. No man is simply man. He is, in a way, woman also.
And no woman is simply woman. Deep down, there is a man hidden. So every
individual, man or woman, is bisexual. The opposite is hidden beneath.
In deep meditation, a sexual orgasm happens - not with someone outside
you, but with your own polar opposite within. You meet there: your inner
woman and your inner man meet. The meeting is spiritual, not bodily.
They penetrate each other, yin and yang. They penetrate each other, they
become one, they merge. Meditation is a deep sexual orgasm between your
own two polar opposites. The same fear comes again.
If you
move deeply into meditation, one day, sooner or later, you will come to
know that now the last moment has come. Death is going to occur: now I
will die. Fear grips you. In that fear, you may come back. If you come
back, you have missed a great opportunity that only comes rarely, very
rarely. Lives and lives pass before this rare moment comes when you
start feeling a deep orgasm within. The inner woman and the inner man
are meeting; your two polar opposites are penetrating each other,
becoming one. You are at the moment when you can become whole. But fear
will be there, because the ego will be lost. You as you know yourself,
your image, will be lost. A new being, not related at all with the old
one, discontinuous with the old one, will be there. But you will die,
with all your past. Fear comes.
Death is encountered in
meditation and death is encountered in sexual orgasm. But if you can
encounter these deaths, you will become capable of encountering the
ultimate death: the death of the ego. And without fear. Once you know
that you can lose yourself and yet can be, once you know that losing is
not really losing but gaining, once you know that merging is not death
but life eternal - once you have known it, there is no death for you.
Your body will die, everything that you have will die, but you - the
very being, the very ground of your existence - is eternal.
And
it is good. If you can experience death in sex, sex itself becomes
spiritual; it becomes a meditation. Once you can know it with the outer
woman or outer man, with the beloved or the lover, it will be easy for
you to move into meditation and create the same phenomenon within that
you have known without.
One can create it directly in the inner
realm also. It will be difficult, but it can be created. Once it is
created and you have known a deep meeting, a deep communion within your
own two polar opposites, outward sex will disappear. It is just a
substitute for this inner sex. I call this inner sex: meditation. You
are alone, in a deep orgasm with your own polar opposite.
Wherever you can feel death, feel it. Don't escape. Death is beautiful;
death is the greatest mystery, more mysterious than life. Through life
you can gain the world, the futile world - meaningless, worthless.
Through death you can gain the eternal. Death is the door.
Socrates was dying; poison had been given to him. His face looked
ecstatic. His friends asked him, "Socrates, you are going to die within
moments. Why are you looking so happy, so blissful? We have never seen
anyone dying with such a blissful face, with such ecstatic eyes. What is
the matter? What is happening to you?"
Socrates said, "I am
entering death, the great mystery. Life is nothing before it. The
unknown is opening before me, the unlimited, the uncharted. I am on a
great voyage. I am losing myself, but gaining the whole universe, the
whole existence."
Don't be afraid of death. The fear of death
debars you from all deep experiences: of love, of meditation, of
ecstasy. Once you are afraid of death, you are debarred from all deep
experiences.
by
k.jagadeesh krishnan
+91-9841121780, 9543187772
Email:jagadeeshkri@gmail.com
a question on homosexuality : Original Question:
The questioner says: I have a lover...and I have an eating disorder.
He asks- The lover is a man?
The questioner answers: Yes.
... that won’t help much. Your Montreal is almost all homosexual, the
whole city. That won’t help much, that cannot become the real thing,
because both the energies are the same. It cannot give you a deep
fulfillment -- at the most it remains masturbatory. A woman is needed.
It is as if you are trying to be reborn from a man. I think sooner or
later in Montreal people will try that -- to be finished with women
completely.
But you are born out of a woman, and deep inside
the unconscious you carry an image of a woman, not a man. And unless you
find a woman with whom you can be in the same deep love as you were
with your mother, into whom you can again enter as you were in the womb
of your mother, you will not be fulfilled. You are deceived --
homosexuality will not help. It can give you a certain comfort -- but it
is false.
To fit perfectly a man needs a woman, a woman needs
a man. They are polar opposites, and that polarity is needed. It is
just as if you are trying to create electricity without polar opposites,
without positive and negative.
Sex is a deep function of
bio-electricity. You are an electrical phenomenon, a woman is an
electrical phenomenon. She is negative, you are positive; she is
passive, you are active. When the active energy meets with the passive
energy in deep communion, there is a fulfillment, there is orgasm. A
cosmic experience happens which leaves no emptiness in you, at least for
the time being.
But your making love to a man, or a woman
making love to a woman, is not going to help. I am not against
homosexuality: I am simply stating a fact. I have no condemnation for
it, but it will not be fulfilling -- that much I have to say.
...Find a woman. If you cannot find one, tell me.
The questioner answers: I feel very great friendship towards women....I feel love, but I don’t feel like I want to make love.
Osho: You will have to. It has become a habit and you have to get out
of it. It has become a dead routine. Make a friendship with a man -- and
that you are doing with women. Make love to a woman -- and that you are
doing with men. You are topsy-turvy.
The questioner replies: But I was also married....
Osho: You remained homosexual. You have made love to a woman but you
were never in it. So try it again, and try here. Just open your eyes and
look again. I know how difficult it is, because once homosexuality
settles in the mind you are attracted only towards men. Suddenly women
don’t exist; they are no longer attractive.
But this is
dangerous. Then this food problem will remain with you your whole life
-- and this is not the only problem. Others will remain and it will be
difficult to solve them. You just have a look. Find a woman, and even if
you just feel friendship, bring her to me, because I will have to talk
to the woman to force you out of your habit. You will need a very very
wise woman to bring you out of your rut. I will make her wise. You just
find one! And if you cannot, I will find a woman and force her to seduce
you!
But first you try -- because the very effort will be
very very good. So from tomorrow morning you start looking. There are
many beautiful women around here, don’t be worried. Somebody will take
pity!
Once you enter into a relationship, the right
relationship in which things flow, your food problem will disappear. It
has to disappear; it is not a problem, it is just symptomatic.
Try, and then we will see. Make it a real search, sincerely try to find
a woman, mm? Because it is time...if you delay, then every day it will
be later and later, and things will become more difficult.
by
k.jagadeesh
+91-9841121780, 9543187772
Email.jagadeshkri@gmail.com
